T H U R S D A Y,     J U L Y   6,    2 0 0 6

-- Weekly "Below the Beltway" Issue" Edition --

T H E     R E A L    E S T A T E    C E N T E R

Character Don’t Mean Crap
     In yesterday's live report from the Anderson Parade, we said shunned Republican Mean Jean Schmidt left her "Character Matters" banner at home, which was a good thing, because she's "NOT" a convicted a serial liar. That was obviously a misprint, since at the parade, several times “TaxKiller Tom” Brinkman called Mean Jean “That Lying Bitch” because she’s "NOW" a convicted serial liar.

     And for all those Angry Andersonians who missed the Fourth of July parade, don't worry. Folks at Anderson-Union Cable were there recoding every boring moment and promise to have it on the air in time for Veterans Day. Members of the Forrest Gump High School Class of 1956 did so want to see themselves on TV, especially the "girls" with their walkers.

     Elsewhere in Anderson, residents are now thanking the Hamilton County Commissioners, the Hamilton County Road Supervisor, the County Engineers, and local deputy sheriffs for ignoring their pleas and petitions. For 15 years, they've begged to have Eversole (in Anderson between Salem and Sutton) widened or the humps removed. This street is only 14 ft wide. For 20 feet of street, they pay $9,000 in property taxes. One hump was added 20 years ago because a neighbor had drainage problems and the other was added for a new subdivision. The engineer's department says they won't lower a street just because people cannot see. In the past two months there have been three cars totaled. Saturday night, a Mc Nick grad over corrected when he went off the road and took out a hydrant and hit a telephone pole taking out the electricity. Sadly, neighbors were hosting a wedding in a tent dotted with twinkle lights. It was LIGHTS OUT at 10 pm for 2 1/2 hrs.

     Speaking of finding fault with our county government, just when we couldn't be more suspicious about Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane's Landmark Hearing at the Hamilton County Auditor's Board of Revulsion (shown at right) on July 13 after our Disingenuous DemocRAT Auditor's "certifiable" appraiser got caught with his contrived bureaucratic attempt to justify the Auditor's arbitrary 41% computer-generated increase, our Resourceful Realtor Jason Gloyd pointed out that the expiration of the term for every one of the Board of Revulsion members listed on the official County website was December 31, 2005. No wonder so many people question the fairness of such a hearing.

     What, no murders in Cincinnati on the Fourth of July? That would mean our Official 2006 Whistleblower/ Smith & Wesson Murder Count is now "44." But that all depends if our TV Coroner O'Dell Owens classifies this as a fatal overdose.

Google Alert for: Cincinnati City Council Jury Selection Begins In Warren Beatty Trial WXIX - Cincinnati,OH,USA ... The Cincinnati city council meeting cameras inside of chambers then caught the sound of six shots being fired during the meeting and then Mayor Mallory hastily ... See all stories on this topic.      Yesterday when Artis Conception sent us his award-winning illustration showing Wyoming Superhero Mayor "Doc" Savage battling evil Judge Meddel over the Wyoming Swimming Pool, we kept getting comic book hero "Doc" Savage mixed up with Dave Savage, the mayor. So today, Artis sent is a subtle reminder to help us remember the difference.

     Our Paul Reveres on Motorcycles on their way directly from Denver to warn us about the illegal alien invasion from Mexico might be wandering around Minnesota today, but while local legals were celebrating the Fourth, the illegals were drinking fifths at the Kellogg Soccer fields. Tents, grills and festivities started at noon and went into the wee small hours. Most said the Quatro de Julio was almost as much fun as Cinco de Mayo.

     At the Springfield Township parade, Brent Gray, DemocRAT running for state rep-tile against incumbent Lou Blessing, had about 20 supporters wearing his shirts, probably the best showing of any candidate. Gray's opponent was a total no-show.

     The Springfield Township DemocRAT Club entered a BMW in the parade. The perfect car to show everyone how out of touch the GOP is, right? With American jobs going overseas, DemocRATS surely know how to position themselves as the party of the working person. You just know that the DemocRAT leasing that car paid for it by taking money from Republicans, either by suing a Republican or by making his living off Republican over-taxed payers.

     Is Schnozzy Heimlich's campaign so hard up for people to wear their t-shirts that they've resorted to "converting" volunteers from other campaigns? First, they told people wearing t-shirts for a judicial candidate that "Headquarters wants everyone in Heimlich t-shirts, since that's the most important race." When that didn't work, they approached people wearing other shirts as they were arriving at festivals to tell them that their candidate wasn't coming and they should "just join us," meaning the Heimlich camp, and offered them their shirts.


Bluegrass Boobs

     Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo wonders if it was really over-taxed payers' money that paid for Goof Doofus to arrive by helicopter for the Independence Parade on Saturday. First, he refused to reimburse Boone County for $13,000 in security for his May fund-raiser with George "Why Am I Here With this Doofus?" Bush and now the over-taxed payers are paying for helicopter travel in his re-election bid?

     Today we hear from some MainStrasse Moderates: "Enough is Enough! As much BS as the "source in MainStrasse" has sent the Blower lately (including the daily Blower bash of Jerry Bamberger), we're surprised our e-mail boxes don't Smell. Folks... you lost the election. (yep, they're still bitching at how the neighbors and businesses actually concerned with MainStrasse voted the six of them out in NOVEMBER 2005). A small group.... LOUD MOUTHS.

    "Jerry Bamberger is easily the most visible, reachable, and plain talking Commissioner in office. As the Director of the MSVA (remember the Commission is only a part time gig here.. as it should be) he's done a fantastic job. The marketing, budget, and profits are at a record, as are donations to charities in the area. Projects are getting done... the MSVA Board is actually working together but unlike the previous Board, it admits there is more to do. Thanks to MSVA and joint projects with the City, the Village looks better than ever.... the 6th Street Promenade actually looks like a Park again... Hell, even the damn Bell Tower, that was sitting there broken for 3 years, is working again!

    "The same people spoke at a recent Commission meeting demanding that the City of Covington award them and only them all of the parking spaces on 6th Street. That's fair. How about Bakewell St.? East of Main? How about we just assign everyone in the City a private space? Funny how some of the hypocritical signers of that petition (numbering a whopping 10!) own four-car garages behind their house but still want Resident spaces in front. It's not about parking. it’s about not being in power. Go ahead and sell your house for the 50% increase in value since you moved in and move to a suburb, we'll help you pack."

We can hardly wait to hear the other side's response.

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